Month: June 2005


  • "Toil awhile, endure awhile, believe always, and never turn back."


     Marcus Annaeus Seneca.

  • Computer Error Messages and The Sprinkler From Hell!


    This morning I turned on the computer as always and headed off to putter around to let it do its thing. It is old (in computer terms anyhow, six) and its memory is pretty full (like mine  ) so it moves prettttty sloooowly inn a morning making all kinds of strange noises(hey JUST like me!!). Today when I popped my head in to see if it was done there was a black screen (bad sign) with a message on it (always a bad sign). It said keyboard not found or not recognized. Now, I could see my keyboard, it was right there in its usual spot right in front of the monitor, so I knew that was not the problem. It had been connected just fine last night, so unless some elves had been in during the night playing with it, it should have been okay. Then I read the rest of the message. It said (remember) Keyboard Not Found. The instructions given afterward were push F1 to continue or DEL to exit set up. Do tell me how, if the computer either cannot find or cannot recognize my keyboard that pushing either of those buttons is going to do squat?! I just did what I normally do in this situations being the high tech soul that I am......I turned it off. I then turned it on again. Apparently it found and recognized the keyboard, because here I am tapping on it right now!


    Since it has been 30C all week my lawn is starting to look crispy and brown. Being the proactive type  I had bought two hoses and two sprinklers, one sideways sprinkler (the kind that goes back and forth) and one that shoots out in a circle (the kind that makes that pssshhht pssshhhht noise). They were bought last weekend (have you SEEN the price of that kind of stuff!!) and remained in my trunk until today. Today the crispness and the brownness of the grass overcame my fear of new things so I decided to set up a sprinkler and water my lawn. (also there is a ban in effect so odd numbered houses must water on odd numbered days).


    Here I sit, soaking wet and dripping all over the keyboard. I don't appear to be able to do anything that has ANYTHING to do with water without getting wet. The box with the sideways sprinkler had lots of instructions, but they were all in what appears to be German. Well, how hard can it be?  I connected the connectors and turned on the water. There appear to be dials controlling the arc of water on this device. My plan was to turn it on and adjust the flow accordingly. HAH! Not so fast! Enough water shot out of that thing to give a fairly good impression of Niagara Falls. I wanted a small stream, a tiny arc for my tiny front lawn. Instead I have been soaking my front door, my driveway and all of Oshawa that happens to drive down my street. (not to mention the pedestrians!). I kept turning the dials this way and that, trying to duck under the water, but all that seemed to do was make me even wetter. To make it all worse two old fellows a few doors down were watching me gradually turn into a wet rat before there very eyes while they sat on their front porch. (They seem to be the unofficial neighbourhood watch. They never say anything to me, but they always seem to be watching!) I valiantly tried to look as though this was what I had expected and intended the outcome of all this to be, but I don't think they bought it. I retreated to the house to let the water fall where it may while I type this out. My plan is then to let it appear that a sufficient amount of time has passed. I can then try out the other sprinkler and get wet all over again!!


    (Addendum: or perhaps addenDUMB!  I did go back outside and suddenly had a flash of insight. My brain suddenly said to me.......TURN THE TAP DOWN!! I had the tap turned on full blast! I turned it lower and now have a nice tiny arc of water sprinkling my lawn.  I'm not sure I should really be telling the world about my brain problems like this!!) I put it down to working evening shift. (I have to put it down to something, it couldn't just be ME!)


     

  • No more whining!! about the furnace or oil tank anyway. One big check mark next to that "micro-movement".  DONE. Brand new furnace, brand new tank.

  • "Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion....I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward."


    Kurt Vonnegut Jr.








    I am teetering on the brink of exhaustion, but trying to keep my sense of humour. It has been HOT here today. The temperature was 30C but with the humidex it felt much hotter. The furnace men arrived at ten am and were here until about five pm. They removed the old oil furnace and tank and installed my brand new one. They also put a chimney liner in and sealed up the hole left from where the wood stove had been.


    While they worked I decided to continue my renovation of the kitchen. Usually I enjoy painting, but really it was too hot to do anything except lay around and sip lemonade. Stubborn creature that I am though, I persisted.


    I stripped the paint off of one drawer and found the wood underneath to be nothing terribly exciting. It didn't seem to be worth the effort. (note to self: in future do not attempt jobs requiring eye goggles and solvent gloves when it is hotter than hell's kitchen!) I then tried priming the cupboard doors after removing the handles. Although it is called  "Problem Solving Primer" (HA!) it appeared to be having some degree of difficulty adhering to the cupboard surface. In my travels I recalled seeing a special primer that promised to stick to anything but had deemed it too pricey. My muleheadedness kicked in and I MADE that paint stick!


    There is one handle that I simply cannot remove. Why is there always something?? !! And why must it be something that my Problem Solving Primer can't help? I was becoming quite cross and if I had been in possession of a chainsaw would probably have quite merrily taken it to the damn thing. (note to others: never, EVER let misslill buy a chainsaw!) I wisely decided to remove my sweaty self to a cooler part of the house and forget all about painting and kitchen renovating.


    Rather stuipedly I switched to curtain rod installation. Ladder in place, drill in hand, ......angst and frustration followed soon after. I believe that if I had two extra hands I could MAYBE get this thing up.  I put the screw in place, drill ready to roll, vrooom! and then PLOP. Down goes the screw, dropped on the floor. After about fifteen hundred attempts I was getting a little bit annoyed. Up the ladder, down the ladder. There must be some secret technique that I just haven't mastered yet.


    At this point I was hot, tired, and starting to wonder whatever had posessed me to buy a house that needed more attention than a newborn baby!! Wisely, I decided to leave that project also and depart from renovation city, mentally if not physically. I uncharacteristically decided not to cook supper and ordered pizza and wings for myself. I then plopped on the couch with copious amounts of diet pepsi and watched "Hellboy". (!!) I had never heard of this movie, but actually really, really enjoyed it. Either it was good or I was just so grateful not to be working on anything that I'd be willing to sit and watch paint dry. (OH MY! baaad choice of metaphor!  )


    Now the sun is setting, it is marginally cooler and I am ready for a nice cool bubble bath and a good read before saying goodnight to another day in home reno land. As I gaze out the window (trying to ignore the fact that the grass is growing at an alarming rate) I see the leaves coming out on my grape vines and greenness and growth all around. It is very quiet here, peaceful in fact. No sound except the birds chirping. I am hot and tired, but also happy. A new day will bring new energy and new ideas. The paint will eventually stick, the handle will come off (one way or another!), the curtain rod will go up. Not today, maybe not tomorrow, but it will all happen. Twenty years from now I hope I'll still be laughing since I'll probably still be trying to hang my living room curtains!!


     

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